Identity over Productivity

A few weeks ago our pastor was talking about the childhood of Jesus. Whether you are a believer or not, you’ve probably heard of him. You know, the Son of God who was sent down to sever the veil between heaven and earth? Yes, that’s the one. Most of what we know about Jesus today is focused on his birth and then the last few years of his life, about 5 paragraphs total. The rest of his life? Well, those years were in parentheses. It’s hard to imagine such a notable figure having his entire early life summed up in only five brief paragraphs, about 280 words in total, but it is. His entire childhood was in parentheses in comparison to his life’s work, which is really only noted after the age of about 35/40.

In comparison, most presidents have multiple books and documentaries sharing the innermost details of their lives. It really made me think about the experience of running a business and how disheartening it can feel when everyone else seems to be in the biography stage and you’re in the… “parentheses.” We’ve all been there. We’ve spent hours, weeks, or even months on something only to have absolutely zero recognition for the time invested. We’ve all felt the heart ache of being left out of a conversation or overlooked for someone much less qualified. Or maybe you’ve experienced a health concern, started a family, or had to take care of an aging parent that slowed down or even paused your professional dreams entirely. These are the less notable seasons of our lives that usually don’t make the professional biography, but encapsulate the greater majority of our lives. 

It is easy to begin to ask yourself if all of this work was really worth it in the end, especially when the destination shifts. However, if you shift your mindset into focusing less on the destination, and more on the person you want to be, it can help you see where all of the experiences in between the parentheses of your life make sense. The unseen work develops your skills and helps you define what you need in the future. The hours spent with your children give you a future worth retiring to, and the years taking care of your aging parents are precious, giving you wisdom and a perspective on life only those who’ve seen it whither away can understand.

These shifts in the way you measure your success help you define what your values are and really, truly, make everything feel worth the effort. So if you have been seriously considering an MLM lately or spending all of your week nights working late in hopes for the promotion, you may want to ask yourself if you are looking for the title or for the person you want to become? At the end of the day, most of what we do in life only matters to those we love, and who love us, so give yourself a little grace and remember that you can start over as many times as you need to and change your destination whenever you want to become the person you are truly called to be. While everyone else may see those seasons in parentheses, know that these are likely the most formative years of your life.